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A Word from Dr Knott – December 2023

The definition of “half-life” is the time required for the amount of substance in or introduced into a living system or ecosystem to be eliminated or disintegrated by a natural process. Not being a scientist, I take this to mean how long it takes for something to decompose to the point that is no longer  is the same substance that it was before it began to decompose. Some things have a half-life of thousands of years, while others, like some medicines, have a half-life of weeks.

With this in mind, recently, I was pondering the half-life of many things. The I thought of the things with the longest half-life. It was then that I stumbled on one the greatest questions regarding half-life so pertinent to the Christmas Season: “What is the half-life of a fruitcake?” Johnny Carson once said that there is only one fruitcake in existence; everyone keeps passing it on to the next person. Seriously, there is one fruitcake in Washington DC given to Rutherford B. Hayes in the 1870’s that is still around. About ten or so years ago pieces of the cake were eaten and not once person got sick.  The Romans created the fruitcake for soldiers in battle. High energy for the raging battle and naturally preserved for consumption later made the fruitcake a staple for the Roman soldier.

But are some modern uses for fruitcake? Here are some suggestions for its use today. 1) A pothole filler. When cars run over it, it will mold to the size of the pothole. 2) If one rounds the edges, use it for a shot put in track and field events. 3) Collect all the fruitcake delivered in your neighborhood and make the speed bumps so needed on your street. 4) A boat anchor has been suggested. 5) A bed warmer (heat to 350 degrees) 6) ice pack (chilled for twelve hours) 7) A scratching post for your cat.

*Please remember that user assumes all liability for broken toes, hernias and other medical ailments resulting therefrom.

What does the half-life of a fruitcake have to do with the Christian faith and Christmas?  I am convinced that faith has a long half-life. Each Christmas crowds attend Christmas Eve services hoping to revive some kind of faith that they have carried with them since childhood. Perhaps the revival comes through an old carol or a Christmas text to be read. In the dim light of candles and the half croaked words of Silent Silent night we look heavenward and yearn for that inspiration that this world matters to God and our lives will not face the void of death alone.  The yearning we have is a certain sign that the half-life of faith is much longer than we once imagined.  We need the celebration of Christmas like the soldiers of Rome needed the fruitcake of old. As the soldiers consumed the cake in the heat of battle for sustenance and energy, likewise, we consume the joy of this event so that we can face the struggles in the year to come. We are reminded that faith is slow to decompose, but it should be used for more than a door stop. At the end of time only three things will continue: cockroaches, fruitcake and Christmas.

The Staff wishes you a very Merry Christmas!

Richard

Remember, we will only have one service on Christmas Eve, the 5:30 candlelight service.

Alamo Heights Presbyterian Church